[Jee Yoon]

AFter you wrote about it I looked into John Feierabend’s “First Steps in Music for Infants and Toddlers.” Would you recommend that book? I am going to try to do a session each week for my kids using the things we’ve been learning here, and want to learn more songs. I’m also going to purchase Elizabeth’s book “you and me makes we,” because I keep forgetting the songs from our weekly videos.

[Jee Yoon]

In my clinical music therapy internship I worked in the NICU as well as pediatric ER, and on the post-labor recovery floor of the maternity department. The emphasis of my internship was music psychotherapy, and I learned so much. And of course as a new mom I used and still use music a lot with my children.

In NICU I used the ocean drum, voice, and guitar to help premature infants’ for regulation, supporting optimal vitals, and support feedings. I also spent time with moms and dads who would visit the NICU to bond with and feed their preemies. I would sit with them and talk about how they could use music to help with latching, sucking, as well as talking about lullabies or what our internship termed Song of Kin, to help with bonding, parent to child, and child to parent. We would do short sessions, most often spontaneous, because parents schedules were very erratic with mom still recovering.

I also ran a weekly mother and baby group where I educated and demonstrated for parents how to use music to help with the aforementioned, as well as to support baby’s development. The moms would have just had a baby and still in the very early stages of recovering, so the group was also for them, to receive music therapy as well. There were opportunities to discuss and share about lullabies that were meaningful for them and could possibly be used as the their song of kin, something that they passed down to their children as a legacy to mark the very special early years of life, something that would remain with them throughout their life, and perhaps be passed down again to the next generation. There was a lot of gentle instrument play using rattles, shakers, ocean drums, gato box, guitar. I shared about using these instruments in different scenarios such as to soothe and regulate emotionally, to help babies track visually and auditorily, and to stimluate, to name a few. The thing that I remember the most was the emphasis I used place on the caregivers’ singing being the most powerful thing for baby to hear. I taught this class before I had my own children and now I can attest to it feeling so true, that the familiarity of a caregivers’ voice is what children love to hear.

I also worked in PEDS ER, and in those settings I used a lot of songwriting interventions as well as story-song experiences. Story song experiences is essentially using a well-known song or story and allowing space for the responses of the patient to come forth and then weaving those into a “new” story, to help the patient externalize their emotions and narratives within a structure and safe familiar vehicle of music. Sometimes there’s resolution, and sometimes just the expression of a child’s fears or anxieties was enough.

And as a new mom who is a music therapist I’m learning every day how music can be so many things. From singing simple rhythmic songs to encourage my son to practice his new skill of clapping and raising his arms “hooray!” to holding my daughter and improvising a spontaneous song that helps her express how sad she feels when she misses dad cause he’s working. It helps her cry, connect with me, and then move through the emotions so we can transition to something else in the day.

[Jee Yoon]

Maggie, I love this point!! Yes, just because a child doesn’t have a diagnosis, or a family doesn’t have an outstandingly presenting need, doesn’t mean that the child/family wouldn’t benefit greatly from the benefits of music-therapy based music groups.

[Jee Yoon]

I’m pretty new to the field of music therapy so I don’t know if I can give a really well-informed answer as my experience in the community is still at the beginning stages. So I’m just going to think out loud on this post with the hopes of hearing your thoughts on my thoughts. Hope that’s okay

I was just thinking about all the professions and programs out there that offer services to young families with or without special needs. Professionals such as occupational therapists, speech-language therapists, physical therapists, teachers (music, art, dance, etc.), psychologists, therapists, art therapists. Or even programs like Music Together (which I would love to have a discussion about with someone who has been to their classes). All of these resources are valuable and I see more and more how these professionals are trying to move from the clinic into the community. For example, I see a lot of instagram stories by pediatric physical/occupational therapists giving tips on how to support your child as they go through their physical developmental milestones. There are also teachers and artists posting about how to bring art into the homes through arts/crafts tutorials for kids.

Music therapy, though, has this wonderful element of music. The way we interact with music is most often if not always meaningful, for one, but it is such a universal experience, and that reality connects us to one another. And to have a music therapist facilitate those musical experiences means that no one, hopefully, gets left behind.

[Jee Yoon]

I think music therapists have the training, and as Maggie pointed out, the continuing education, in so many areas that are valuable to working with young families – music, child development, ethics, trauma-informed care, etc. Music therapists are trained to observe and assess and create goals, not in a sterile manner, but within the vehicle of an enjoyable, beautiful, and easily accessible musical experience. It may put young families feel at ease about opening up their story and lives to find the support and connection that is so crucial for wholeness in those first few years.

Music therapists’ ability to build therapeutic rapport relatively quickly is in large part due to the therapy being shrouded within a musical experience, it is safe, universal, in the moment, familiar, and predictable. I know as a new mom, I craved that sense of safety, and empathetic connection.

I also think music therapists are the most joyful bunch of humans on the planet! Its obvious in the videos from this week, that the parents responded so positively to their music therapists’ passion and care for their families.

[Jee Yoon]

Greta, I know so well how hard it is to be present with my children throughout the day. There is so much to do. Cooking, cleaning, diaper changes, laundry, self-care (at minimum brushing teeth), napping…. Its such a a marathon. And even though I’m a music therapist, I find it so challenging to actively observe and listen, and be present with them, let alone use my therapeutic skills to foster attachment, safety, support/build skills. I’m so excited to learn more from the songs and interventions that will help me be those things for my kids – a more present and engaged parent. I think it will be an amazing resource for other parents, because i’m sure almost every parent feels similarly.

[Jee Yoon]

Greta, I know so well how hard it is to be present with my children throughout the day. There is so much to do. Cooking, cleaning, diaper changes, laundry, self-care (at minimum brushing teeth), napping…. Its such a a marathon. And even though I’m a music therapist, I find it so challenging to actively observe and listen, and be present with them, let alone use my therapeutic skills to foster attachment, safety, support/build skills. I’m so excited to learn more from the songs and interventions that will help me be those things for my kids – a more present and engaged parent. I think it will be an amazing resource for other parents, because i’m sure almost every parent feels similarly.

[Jee Yoon]

Maggie, I don’t have much experience working with families with children with unique needs, so I really appreciated you pointing out that these parents can feel isolated. And that these classes/programs can offer a chance for connection just by the nature of its format.

[Jee Yoon]

I also wanted to add that in my community parents talk (and ask) a lot about where/when/if they are sending their children to daycare and/or preschool from very early on. And yet, as it happens to be in our case, there are those who have chosen to keep their children at home until kindergarten. The reason may be financial, or other. For those families, having a resource such as sprouting melodies would be so valuable. Being a full-time caregiver is, in my opinion, the hardest job in the world, and to have a community-based EC music therapy group can be a place for parents to connect with others and be equipped with tools that can then be brought home and used while parenting. That is priceless.

[Jee Yoon]

What are the needs of the families that you work with?

I’m not working at the present moment but after having two children I’ve connected with quite a few caregivers in my immediate neighborhood whose needs are varied. There have been a handful of caregivers who have children with special needs: autism, a toddler with a vestibular disorder, another who is delayed in speech development, and another family where two of their children are being assessed for developmental disorders as of yet undiagnosed. And there are a handful of acquaintances who have expressed interest in a music group because they need more community as well as a reason to leave the house.

How can music meet the unique needs of your families and community?

I believe that through music children’s needs can be met in non-threatening, enjoyable, and enduring ways, whether they are more typically developing or requiring extra support to be successful at their level of development. The elements of music, and the environment it creates, not only provide opportunities for the more clinical goals of the children to be met, but also for the social-emotional needs of the caregivers to be met as well. The music, when easy to engage with and learn, can provide a sense of safety and familiarity that can foster connection between caregivers, between caregivers and their children, and between caregivers and the music therapist. It can help build self-confidence, self-awareness, and other-awareness that is much needed in those early years of parenting, which would then trickle down to their children in return.

[Jee Yoon]

Greta I loved your points so much!

1. Working at the hospital with children and families must give you such an appreciation for how a music therapist’s work doesn’t start and end with a music therapy session, but it includes looking at and taking into account all the factors that extend out because of their sick child being in hospital. Considering the family unit as being part and parcel of the therapy must give you a perspective unique to your setting, and so invaluable.

2. I think your thoughts about doing groups on weekends and early evening sounds very interesting and possibly promising. There is a gap there, but I wonder if the reason for it is because families usually do family time on weekends (getaways, day trips) and early evenings are crazy for parents with young children. I know mine is, lol! If there was a weekend music group in my area i think I would definitely go though, because my husband works on Saturdays.

3. Your perspective on toys/resources for children, resounds with a sort of minimalism that I absolutely love. For example my son would rather bang/hold/play/suck on a spoon or plate as opposed to the fancy toys (I had bought my first) on the shelves. And we can make music with just that. I understand as children develop their environment may need to become more sophisticated, but I agree that it shouldn’t be burdensome and make parents feel inadequate or insecure. I’ve definitely stewed in those feelings since having children,

[Jee Yoon]

Maggie, I can definitely attest to the experience you had as the music therapist facilitating the 8-week program, but from the standpoint of a mom. If the library i went to didn’t close during the pandemic I would have kept going, and felt more connected during the past two years of raising two little ones age 1 and newborn. I also loved your point about being mindful of all the different needs that may be present in the community. It actually is daunting to recognize that being a leader in the community means being able to serve so many different people with humility and sensitivity.

Greta, I think its such a helpful tip by meredith regarding some of the words we might use to market ourselves. And definitely in the Asian community, especially the grandparent generation, the word therapy does not have a positive connotation. I love the phrase you use, “Do you want to do music?”

[Jee Yoon]

Sing:

Awareness – baby will become calm when hearing a familiar melody/song
Trust – baby will show emotion (pleasure) when they hear a familiar melody/song
Independence – baby can recognize when a familiar song is altered in contour and range
Control – child can now make known their preference for a specific song known, using gesture or words
Responsibility – the child can now sing for themselves preferred songs using both melodic contour and rhythm

Play:

Awareness – Baby may turn their eye gaze and/or their facial attention toward source of sound
Trust – Baby can reach out to touch instruments and explore it with hands and/or mouth
Independence – Baby will reach for and/or retrieve musical instrument, and can now explore with hands/feet/mouth as well as move the instrument using their arms to shake it (bells, shakers, maracas)
Control – child may now indicate preferred instrument and use it functionally in a more musical manner (play basic beat, varied tempos)
Responsibility – child can play rhythmic patterns using two hands

Move:

Awareness – baby tolerates body parts being moved rhythmically for them
Trust – baby moves body parts rhythmically, or even entire body, when rhythmically steady music is played for them
Independence – baby can rock or bounce rhythmically as well as alter movement in response to changes in music
Control – child can isolate body parts to move them rhythmically to given music
Responsibility – child creates novel movement patterns in response to music

Listen:

Awareness – baby can turn their head to the voice of familiar voices because they recognize the timbre of the voice (mother’s voice)
Trust – baby can recognize a familiar melody
Independence – baby responds to music by matching the intensity of the musical elements by reciprocating with intensity of movement, or facial expression, or vocalization.
Control – child stops what they are doing to listen to music, which shows they are actively absorbing the elements of the music
Responsibility – child can now put their own music and preferences aside in order to attend to the music of others and/or the larger group

[Jee Yoon]

My work was mostly with older adults with some form of dementia or terminal/chronic illness, and its fascinating how at the end of life, the experiences and support offered can be similar to early childhood depending on their cognitive and physical functioning, to speak generally of course.

I do use these music experiences almost every day with my children.

Singing:

I used to sing to my daughter all the time, especially during bedtime. I’ve watched her develop from just listening to my singing, to cooing when she heard a familiar lullaby, to filling in the blanks at the end of phrases, to singing along, and now to singing her own songs. Its been an amazing progression to be witness to. And when she started to sing familiar/known songs more independently, around 30 months, she would demand that, “Mommy no sing. only Audrey sing.” Now she tells me not to sing, and she independently sings spontaneously improvised songs, or sings in that manner while coloring or reading.

Reading through the book on the chapter of responsibility, I realized that my daughter is really ready to be offered opportunities that make use of her quickly developing range of skills. For example, considering her ability to hold long phrases in memory, a few days ago I did a learn by rote singing experience/game to help us get through toothbrushing time. I would sing a phrase while I brushed her teeth, then I would stop brushing and she would sing it back to me, then I would sing another phrase, or repeat the same one if she needed another try, while i brushed some more. And so on and so forth. It gave her something to concentrate on while doing one of her least favorite activities of the day. By day three she had learned the song (short as it was) even if not memorized.

Playing:

With two kids life is just so much busier with the cooking, cleaning, diaper changing, napping, etc… so its a challenge to squeeze in music time together but my second is always surrounded by his big sisters’ music (currently its my little pony on repeat), but he doesn’t seem to engage with it as actively compared to when I offer him music that is sung and played live. I think he is in the stage of independence and yesterday I pulled out two floor drums, a tambourine and two soft mallets and let him choose what he wanted to play. I supported him by showing him how to pick up the mallet and hit the large drum’s head, then I continued by singing and clapping to a strong rhythmic song. He picked up the mallet and attempted to copy what I just showed him for about 5-10 seconds, then he dropped the mallet, as it was too heavy for him, and started hitting the drum with his hand. I gave him a lighter mallet and he tried again with a more rhythmic pattern.

Movement:

My son has also been pulling himself up to stand for a many weeks now, and I realized what a perfect time to help him strengthen his legs as well as his internal sense of rhythm. So i play the guitar for him, a very rhythmically strong and steady song, and he will bop up and down, bending his knees and banging his hands on the sofa, which he uses to balance. I also do old/traditional Korean movement songs where the lyrics are the movement cues. Translated its basically “Clap, clap clap clap. Hands in the air.” Just this week he clapped for the first time and threw his hands in the air. He was so thrilled with himself.

He also loves to play the guitar, although he can’t yet control his grip, so there’s a lot of support I offer him when I let him play it.

Listening:

I use vocalizing all the time when I’m trying to hold my son’s attention. Especially when I have to clip his nails. When you change diapers, sometimes I just have to pin him down with my leg, but when clipping nails there is no way to keep his little fingers still without hurting him, so I use my voice. I chant, repeat sounds, do crescendos and decrescendos, sing high then low, loud then soft, and make all sorts of sound effects. Not only the does the vocal sound hold his attention, but I think the changes between the different sounds do as well. I find that vocalizing is more effective than anything else in keeping him still, as he is absorbing the information.

[Jee Yoon]

Thank you MAggie for the info! I’m glad I received it!

[Author]

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